I've had a couple of dates with a woman who seems to have a lot of potential. What is your rule of thumb for when and how to introduce her to my friends? What sort of situations should I avoid?
Dennis W. Neder Answer:
Women understand the importance of a man's friends AND family. My own rule of thumb is that she doesn't meet them until after the 4th or 5th date - and never before I sleep with her.
Why? Because women know that once they get "in" with your friends, they can use them to manage you. Here's an example:
Say your new woman and your friends really hit it off. Very soon (if not immediately), your friends will start inviting you AND her places. This insures that you are with her (in her eyes). Now, say you want to invite someone else. Your friends are going to start asking questions. Thus, you'll be more likely to take the previous girl rather than a new one.
On the other hand, if she's up for it, I always want to meet HER friends as early as possible. I will charm them, make them laugh, buy them all a drink or two, and generally get in good with them. When I'm not with her, her friends will be telling her what a great guy I am, (insert evil laugh).
The downside to this is that women are tighter friends than men are. Your male friends may even see her as "available" to them - and compete with you for her! (Be careful whom you choose as friends!) Thus, if you've got something solid going with her BEFORE you bring her around your friends, so much the better for you.
Regarding your buddies, make sure that you make time for them without her too! Many men get all wrapped up in the couple, and forget that they knew their friends before she entered the picture. If you take care of your buddies, they will always be there when you need them. You can't always say the same thing about girlfriends.
Good luck, much love...
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