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I
get a lot of emails from guys who read my articles that say things
like...
"I'm sure what you're saying is right, but I don't want to be
a jerk or an a**hole to women..."
"I have seen what you're talking about happen all my life,
but I'm a 'nice guy' and I want women to like me for me..."
...and...
"This doesn't make sense..."
I'd like to address these ideas.
Up until about 5 years ago, I was THE nice guy of nice guys. As a
matter of fact, when I first made the decision to learn how to be
successful with women, this actually created an obstacle for me.
Let me explain...
Because I believed that "being a nice guy" MUST be the
way to success with women, I ACTUALLY COULDN'T EVEN PERCEIVE ANY
OTHER WAY.
In other words, I could see a situation where a woman was
attracted to a mean, abusive guy and think to myself that either
she must be screwed up in the head, or THAT THE GUY MUST BE REALLY
NICE TO HER THE REST OF THE TIME.
As you probably know, it's hard to convince a person to believe
something when they already have a belief about the topic. The
person that you're trying to convince just uses whatever you say
to convince themselves that they're actually right... and you're wrong.
Well,
I did the exact same thing.
No matter how much evidence I found to the contrary, I still
somehow believed that being a "nice" guy, buying women
flowers and gifts, taking them out, and generally letting them be
in control of the relationship HAD to be the way to attract them.
Well, after continuing along the same path and getting the same
results, I realized something that literally changed EVERYTHING for me.
I
realized that JERKS do, in fact, attract hot women.
Selfish behavior, as unhealthy as this might sound, often makes
women feel attracted to you.
Sarcasm, ball busting, playing hard to get, and all kinds of
other "illogical" things really do work when it comes
to attracting women.
But then I had a dilemma...
I love the idea of being successful with women, but I HATE the
idea of mistreating people, being mean to them, lying and
misleading, etc.
To
be continued as below...
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girl, you have to make the girl you love, fall in love with
you. I have found the tightly guarded secrets that can make
your dream come true. That is called GuyGetsGirl...
I highly recommend it. See what you think... GuyGetsGirl
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Deep down, I want to be a good guy.
I decided that there MUST be a way to make this work, and to
attract women without being ABUSIVE.
The good news is that THERE IS a
way.
But it requires that you put aside your current ideas for just
long enough to entertain some new ones.
First, let me say that I believe I've found a way to take the
things that JERKS do to attract women and use them WITHOUT THE
ABUSE. When you learn to do this, you can really have the best
of both worlds... you can be nice to women on your own terms,
and give them what they REALLY
want, and what REALLY attracts
them.
So WHY DO WOMEN BECOME ATTRACTED TO JERKS?
The short answer is that they don't CHOOSE it, it's something
that just HAPPENS.
ATTRACTION ISN'T A CHOICE.
It's an emotional response to certain things.
Women don't CHOOSE to feel the emotion called ATTRACTION for
jerks any more than YOU choose to feel the emotion called
ATTRACTION for young, beautiful, hard bodied women.
Nature has pre-programmed MEN with a mechanism that works like
this:
SEE HOT WOMEN ---> FEEL ATTRACTION
Well, women have a similar mechanism. But I think that the
female version is MORE COMPLEX.
Yes, women do feel attraction for extremely handsome men... but
they feel a MUCH STRONGER ATTRACTION for certain PERSONALITY
TRAITS and BEHAVIORS than they do for physical looks alone.
So again, the short answer is that it's just something that
"happens" inside of a women. She doesn't
"choose" it.
If you want the long answer to this, check out my CD Series
"Advance Dating Techniques". I've spent a long time
figuring this one out, and I guarantee that it will blow your
mind when you find out what's REALLY going on...
To
be continued as below...
So what is it about the "jerk" that creates this
powerful, uncontrollable ATTRACTION inside of women?
Let me answer first by telling you what IT'S NOT:
It's NOT the abuse (not usually anyway). I don't believe that
women are attracted to that abusive, mean, negative part of the
"jerk personality".
I think that jerks JUST HAPPEN to also possess several
ATTRACTIVE qualities that are SO POWERFUL that that they
literally make women BLIND to the abuse... women will
rationalize and excuse the abusive behavior because they are so
attracted to these other qualities.
Here's a PARTIAL list of what creates that ATTRACTION:
-Unpredictability
-Uncontrollable
-Challenge
-Dominance
Of course, there are many more, but this will get us started for
this discussion.
The qualities I've listed above, when presented correctly,
trigger the natural "attraction mechanism" inside of
women.
Jerks have taken natural qualities that are ATTRACTIVE to women
a little "too far".
But because they're still there, the qualities trigger the
attraction anyway.
So what does this mean to you?
Well, the most important thing is that it means you can still be
a good guy and attract women at the same time.
You're probably going to have to learn how to flirt in a
different way, become a little more comfortable being
challenging to women, etc. But in the end, you'll find that this
will get you what you want, and still allow you to treat women
well... all on your own terms.
It also means that instead of being the guy who women talk to
about their relationship problems, and how their mean jerk
boyfriend is being abusive again... you can be the guy who
they're dating and sleeping with!
Yes!
This weekend I'd like you to think about what I've said here in
this newsletter.
Think about how you can cultivate the four qualities that I've
mentioned above into your personality.
See if you can be a little less predictable.
Don't let outside events or women control you.
Be more of a challenge.
Stop being submissive... and get in touch with that side of you
that is more dominant (I said "dominant", not
"domineering").
And if you haven't had a chance to read my eBook and listen to
my Advanced CD Program, then I HIGHLY recommend that you do that
as well.
My eBook "Double Your Dating" is the foundation for
everything that I teach. In a few hours of reading time you can
learn all about my basic theories, plus get dozens of great
techniques for meeting and dating women. You can go download it
at:
http://www.doubleyourdating.com/129/
- just follow the 'eBook' link and download your copy.
...and
read it, learn it, and use it.
Talk to you soon,
David D.
SuccessStories@doubleyourdating.com
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